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Thursday, August 17, 2006 

Let the games begin

So, as I alluded to in my last post, I've been *kinda* seeing someone for a few weeks. Actually, I've been seeing several people, but he's the one I've seen more than once. Monday was our fourth date, and, well...I spent the night with him.

It's so funny. We live really close to each other, and we go to a lot of the same political protests and rallies, but had never met. We talk almost exactly the same way (Dude, that was awesome!), and even listen to some of the same randomly odd music. He's smart (an environmental engineer), plays guitar (he plays something appropriate every time we're together.) Once, after we "did it," he played Hot Chocolate's ”You Sexy Thing”. Tuesday morning he played me The Beatles' ”Here Comes the Sun”. Physically, he's totally my type, which is to say, kind of nerdy with glasses. So effing cute. And tall. I've always liked tall men - maybe because I'm a pygmy.

Here's the thing, though: we both went into this with the explicit understanding that this was going to be a casual thing. Monday did not feel "casual." I don't know what got into us, but we talked a lot. About politics, religion, music, sex...everything. All that before we even went back to his place (we met at a bar.) That's a problem, because I don't think that I am ready for any real relationship right now. I'm pretty sure he's not either, but I don't know - we haven't actually spoken since we parted ways Tuesday morning.

I really had no desire to be that girl, so I didn't call him yesterday. Today, I sent him an email that said "Thanks for hanging out. I had a really good time with you on Monday. Sorry I pushed you out of bed." Um, it was an accident.

He replied with "Thanks I had a good time too. I really enjoyed... [REDACTED!] ...your new leather boots." Ahem.

My first inclination is to call or write him and tell him that "Hey, I know that you and I seemed really serious about each other the other night, but let's pretend that didn't happen..." I know it's ridiculous. I think too much. I probably don't need to say anything to him.

And so, the odd ritual of when to call (or not), who should make the first move (or not) begins.

As my dear friend said when I told her about all this, "OMG! Dude! Straight people are so weird."

Update: I just realized that this was my 100th post. Woo hoo!

Umm... sounds like a weird dating purgatory/limbo land and honestly, I've mostly forgotten this....

My 2 cents?... even though you are totally not looking for advice, is to keep it casual by pretending it is casual (ie., don't say boo) and see what happens.

"Relax" is what I'm trying to stress here. Keep it light (ie, try not to analyze and just "be", go with the flow, etc...).

But then... I could be completely off my rocker.

First off, YAY that you're digging a guy who you obviously have some great chemistry with!

Not only are straight people weird, straight guys are the weirdest!!! :p

Yeah, buzz, you might be overthinking that one. :)

Just ENJOY!!! :) If you feel like calling, then do it, and if you don't, then don't! Go with the flow and then you'll see what happens! :-)

Where do you find all these cute guys, anyway, eh? :)

Sounds painfully familiar to me! I know that struggle all to well. You don't want to be too aloof and give him the wrong impression but it is still early in the game, so to speak, and you don't want to "go there" yet. I agree with the others...do your best to keep things light for now. Make sure that he knows you're still interested but keep it light. I'm sure the guitar playing afterwards doesn't help keep you focused though!!!

OMG, happy 100th!!!

Hey, I posted a comment, and it got eaten! No fair!!

I'll check back, in case it's still chewing on the dang thing.

So is this one the freak, or the nice guy, referred to in your previous post?!?!? Either way, glad you've found someone to be with - and don't have The Big Conversation yet! (There was a Dan Savage column on this topic a few weeks ago - he gave some very useful advice!)

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