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Friday, September 22, 2006 

Last day of summer

As summer officially comes to an end, so should my insane behavior. This was the summer of insanity for me. I often really wanted to write about it, but since becoming a member of the blogging community, and establishing "real life" relationships with some of you, I really can't tell you what I've been doing (though I have seriously considered starting another blog just to vent about it.) Suffice it to say, that it's been self-destructive, demeaning, and frankly unsafe. But that's over. I hope. I can't let my daughter see me self destruct.

I've survived my first week of employment! And guess what? I am writing this post from a coffee shop while my daughter is at Girl Scouts - on the brand-spanking new laptop I was given for work. Woo hoo!

I haven't written in a while, and I've been making little notes to myself of reminders of things to mention. Those notes are at home, so it'll have to wait.

E dumped my ass - TWICE (I'm still not exactly sure why), and G (still) considers me his fallback when his other plans don't pan out. I should have added "self-respect" to my Amazon wishlist.

Hang in there, babe. We all have our seasons of insanity.

Buzzgirl, I do hope you respect yourself because you are deserving. I also hope that you know your virtual friends are here by your virtual side.

Yikes. I know exactly what you mean about self-censorship on the blog - as you know. I think you shouldn't worry a whole lot about what we (online) think about what you might write, and if anyone of us starts becoming a judgmental @sshole, then you should, too, dump our virtual asses. If you can't be yourself online, then what is the point?

About G, E, ... try not to worry too much. You know, everybody comes with their own sets of problems and making relationships work is an incredibly difficult proposition for most of us these days, for a variety of reasons, so please don't be too hard on yourself.

Also, in my opinion, whoever tells you that they've never been involved at least once with someone they KNEW was wrong for them, only because they wanted a little companionship at that time, is a f...cking hypocrite.

I like this term "seasons of insanity". I think I'll steal it from time to time if that's ok. Much better than "going through a rough spot"!

Hope you are doing okay Buzzgirl. Maybe you need another trip to Paris to get your "seasons" adjusted! :-)

As my mom always says, "A girl can do bad on her own." So you know what you need to do, and now you just need to do it.

You are a beautiful black woman. Take care of yourself, take of your daughter and take no shit!

I too appreciate your inclination to censor. I created my blog so that I wouldn't have to do that and now that I've established these friendships through the blogsphere, I find that I hesitate to be as open as I felt I could be initially.

And yet, I so agree with Tomate. Your friends will accept you, despite whatever choices you've made. Of course, friends are concerned for one another but ultimately, there should be no judgment with true friends. I'm not sure if this helps...but you are always welcome to email me and vent. We probably have a lot of parallel things going on in our lives...that generally seems to be true with us!

Take care of yourself, Buzzgirl.

Insanity comes and goes, try to enjoy the ride.

Never hold back, life is too short.

I hope you are taking good care of yourself!!! As you know, I get the whole "season of insanity" thing pretty well. My blog is completely public to everyone who knows me in real life so I can't write about it (my "other" blog is completely hidden, a true private diary)... so anyway, Fall is a great time of new beginnings (for us Libra Jews, anyway) so here's hoping for a fresh start!

PS glad you got the postcard!

Jesus, I need to put a new photo in my profile!

Ok anyway, I was reading this article in the village voice and it made me think of you a little bit. Or maybe it just made me think of me. Anyway:

http://villagevoice.com/nyclife/0639,araujo,74562,15.html

I'm waiting impatiently for an "update" Buzzgirl.

As I'm stil sitting here waiting for an update, I thought I'd pass on this blog I found that thought you might find amusing.

http://thepaperdoll.blogs.com/

Hope you're doing well!

congrats on the new employment and new laptop. i love a job with perks. hope fall is a better season for you.

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