Tuesday, November 28, 2006 

Baby? Boom!

Okay, people. What the hell is going on here? A number of blogs that I read (listed to your right) are by expats living in France. All chicks. Most of whom are either knocked up now, or have given birth within the last month. To wit:

Lee Ann

Have I missed anyone? I *did* forget someone: Riana.

What gives? Is there really nothing else for y'all to do? And just because you're not listed here yet, don't think I'm not anticipating announcements from you, too Madame K and Sam. You're not working on another one right now, are you Jennifer?


The "C" List

I am a "C" list blogger.

What list are you on?

C-List Blogger

Wednesday, November 22, 2006 

I don't cook

It's not that I can't, I actually can. It's just that I don't. I swear to god that if I didn't own a microwave, my kid would starve. It's horrible, I know. But there are tons of cheap, tasty places to eat in my neighborhood.

Of course, there are occasions. Thanksgiving is not one of them. You'd think it would be, but it's not. At least not for me. I haven't been to my mom's for the holiday in at least five years. Maybe more. I don't remember. I usually end up at a friend's home - which is where we'll be again this year.

No, I'll usually only cook if I have an uncontrollable craving for something. Like brussels sprouts. Seriously. I know people hate them, and usually, I'm ambivalent about them. But sometimes I have to have them. Unfortunately, they're a bit labor intensive to prepare. I have decided, however, to share with you my favorite preparation thereof. It's not a recipe, per se, because I never actually measure anything (unless I'm baking.) But here goes:

Get a couple of pounds of brussels sprouts, some chicken stock, salt & pepper, a lemon or two, some good grated parmesan, a few cloves of garlic, some bread crumbs and a few slices of thick-cut bacon.

Prep the sprouts by trimming the ends off and cutting in half. Braise in stock until semi-soft. Drain. Fry up the bacon (we don't have lardons here, or I'd use them) and chop it up (not too finely - you wanna know you're eating bacon!) Chop up and sautee the garlic. Transfer the sprouts to a baking dish, season with s & p, mix in the bacon and garlic, mix together the breadcrumbs and cheese and sprinkle it on top. Throw the whole thing under the broiler till it's golden brown. Squeeze a little lemon juice on just before serving. Delish.

Of course, one could go veggie (or even vegan) by using vegetable stock instead of chicken, and omitting the bacon and cheese but, why, why, why??!! My life's motto is "everything's better with bacon."

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all.

Monday, November 13, 2006 

The Kool Keith/Dr. Octagon Show!

*I just realized that I left out the part of the story about how I got onstage/backstage/to the hotel with the band. Sheesh. I've added that info., so hopefully the story makes more sense.*

So, no one I knew wanted to go see Kool Keith/Dr. Octagon with me on Saturday night, so I planned to go alone. Actually, I was originally going to go with that chick I met at G's party (his other concubine) but it was too weird, and she started to creep me out...Naomi said her friend might like to go. I called him up, and we planned to meet outside of the venue at 8:00 (the show started at 9:00). We met up, got some Thai food, and went back.

We got some drinks and waited for the show to begin. The line up was supposed to be three acts, and then Kool Keith, who was supposed to go on at midnight. The opening acts were okay... but there were 5 or 6 of them. At around midnight (with no Keith in sight) I turned around, and noticed that Aaron (the guy I went with) was gone. That was weird. No goodbye or anything. Whatever.

Finally at about 1:15, Keith (as his Dr. Octagon persona) came on. He did two songs, and then Denis (another rapper in his crew) brought out a Victoria's Secret bag. "We got something for the ladies," he said, and started handing out various panties/g-strings to women in the audience. I got a really cute pair. Seriously - not skanky in the least, even though the price tag revealed that they were actually from Fredericks of Hollywood rather than VS. These are them! Same color, too:

Next he said, "All the ladies that got panties, come on stage." Six of us took him up on the offer. When we got up there, we were instructed to put the panties on - over our jeans was fine. And then we danced to the next couple of songs. A couple of us started to gather our things to make our way back to the audience, but were told that we could stay on stage the whole time and watch the show from there! Awesome. We set ourselves up at the back of the stage (where the booze was) and danced our asses off the rest of the night. The whole time I was onstage, I was thinking "I wonder if Aaron still here. I wonder if anyone I know is in the audience." Probably none of my old-ass friends were still awake! After the show, we were invited backstage to hang out with the band. And drink. Here's a fun fact: these "hard" rappers and old-skool hip hoppers' drink of choice? Stoli Vanilla! For some reason, that cracks me up. So, after an hour or so of hanging out, taking pictures, exchanging emails, having Keith leave a voicemail for el creepo, the facilities people asked the party to leave. So we all went back to the hotel. And drank. And talked.

At about 3:30 we all went downstairs so folks could smoke (it's a non-smoking hotel). I decided it was time for me to go. I tried hailing a cab. When Keith noticed, he asked why I was trying to leave. Did I have to work in the morning? "Yes," I fibbed. My ass was just tired. At this point he asked me how much I made, and offered to pay me to stay. "I'll give you your net, right now." What the fuckity fuck?! Was I wearing Eau de Whore perfume? I turned down his kind offer and left. I really needed to go.

All in all, it was a really fun, really weird night. Even if I did get ditched! What the fuck?

The best part for me, honestly was that all the guys were into me. Not just Keith, but the younger guys too. It was weird. I was the oldest woman there. I was the only Black woman. And lets just say that I was not the thinnest, either. I usually feel like the "homely homie" in situations where I'm with a bunch of other women. Unfortunately, my friends are hot, and I always feel inferior (I really need to get some ugly friends.) But Saturday night was all about my ego. It was nice.

So, just to clarify, I did not hook up with anyone (none of us girls did). Which frankly, I think pissed the guys off. Too bad.

But it was fun.

Saturday, November 11, 2006 

So, it's been a year...

...since I started this blog. And what have I got to show for it? Bubkes (or however you choose to spell it - I've seen it several ways.)

Over the last year I've ended my celibacy streak. A celibacy not by choice, mind you, but one that was thrust upon me. So to speak. Perhaps as a result, I've gone crazy. Ok, to clarify, I've always been a little crazy. But I've gone off the deep end.

On the bright side, I've started seeing a shrink (we've only met once.) It's weird.

What else? Oh, here's something! I did the three month-long Colonix internal cleansing program. I can now happily report that while I may be as figuratively as full of shit as ever, I am now much less literally so. Ahem.

I interviewed for several jobs, accepted one, quit three months later, went to Europe, came back unemployed and didn't work again for five months until my current job just kind of landed in my lap.

While I'm neglecting to fill in the blanks of what my life has been like over the past four months (not good), I have also had some good things happen. I found a community of bloggers, once anonymous, now friends. Which is great, because I don't make friends in "real life" all that easily - though I have made one recently, which has been kind of cool.

I've been really bad about updating this thing - mostly because I've come to the point where I'd just be censoring myself anyway. I'm not sure how useful it's become to me. I have some things to think about, I s'pose.

Tonight, I'm going to see Dr. Octagon which should be weird. And fun. I hope.

And I am pleased, for the most part, about the mid-term election results. So that's something...

I've just switched over. Not sure I'm feeling the "new" Blogger. What do y'all think of it?