Wednesday, January 24, 2007 

I couldn't last a week

I took the cast off last night. Believe me, it wasn't easy. But it had to be done. It never once occurred to me that claustrophobia would manifest itself in this way.

I sheepishly called the doctor this morning to confess my misdeed. He directed me to come in immediately. After checking the wound (egads, it is horrific looking) he asked me if I thought I could handle it if he put another cast on, because it really needs to be protected. I said that I didn't think so. So, I'm back in a new boot. I'm still not allowed to bear any weight on it, and I'm supposed to leave it on at all times - as if it were a cast. Honestly, I think the fact that I can so easily take it off (its closures are velcro) is enough for me. Right now, anyway.

Oh, and apparently the doctor did, in fact, talk to me following the surgery. I just have no memory of it. I hope I didn't say anything too embarrassing.

Sunday, January 21, 2007 

Brief surgery recap

Well, I didn't die. I am deathly afraid of general anesthesia, and it took a lot of convincing on the anesthesiologist's part, but I survived.

As far as I know, the surgery was a success - I haven't talked to the surgeon since. I have a follow up appointment on Friday.

Crutches suck. My armpits, pectoral muscles and sides are all extremely sore. I literally have to hop everywhere on the crutches because I am not allowed to bear any weight on my left foot. Yesterday I rented a wheelchair. Hopefully this will make my life easier over the next month.

Friday night (the night of the surgery) I woke up out of a Vicodin induced sleep at about midnight and freaked the fuck out. I got the kid up and drove to the emergency room (ouch, ouch, ouch - the clutch nearly killed me.) I thought I was having an allergic reaction to the cast, that it was too tight, and that it needed to come off NOW.

The young, shaved head, tatted up doctor tried to talk me down. He assured me that I was having a common reaction called "confinement syndrome." He said it's a form of claustrophobia. He refused to take off the cast, and basically begged me not to - 'cause I told him I'd do it my own damn self.

He gave me a prescription for Ativan to quell my anxiety. While I was at Walgreens filling the prescription, I also invested in a bunch of sterile bandages and tape... in case I couldn't make it with the cast.

So far, the cast is still on, but I feel better having the medication, bandages, tape, and a big pair of scissors by my bed. Just in case.

Friday, January 19, 2007 

I'm going under the knife today

Wish me luck.

I'll hobble back to my computer when I can.

Thursday, January 11, 2007 

It was for a good cause

There's a local business here in San Francisco called Dark Garden. It is a store dedicated to all things corsetry. Yes. Corsets. I've never had any attraction to corsets. They look complicated - and painful. My only reference has been those I've seen on fetishists at the Folsom St. Fair



or Renaissance Faire nerds.



Neither is a particularly appealing demographic for me, so I'm not actually sure why I bid on the item at the silent auction for my kid's school. I bid on three or four things not expecting to get any of them, because I'm, you know, poor. Well, poorish. Imagine my surprise when I got an email on Monday letting me know I won the $200 gift certificate to the corsetry shop. Of all the things I bid on, this is the one I win? Sheesh.

So, Bink and I went yesterday evening to check the place out. The shop looks exactly like some place Stevie Nicks would shop. I explained to the woman that I had this gift certificate, but was clueless about corsets. She was really nice and walked me through their stuff. They are known, apparently for their custom made corsets (costing upwards of $700). Yeah, not for me, thanks. Let's work within the parameters of the gift certificate and buy something off the rack, shall we?

First step was taking my measurements. We went into the dressing room where she, armed with a tape measure, asked me to take off my shirt and bra. As I did, I thought to myself "Wow, she's just gotten further than my last date." She said "It looks like you've lost some weight recently." I was so happy. I've lost 25+ lbs. over the last six months or so. It wasn't until later that I realized that the only reason she would know that would be because of my stretch marks/excess skin. Eeeewwww, nasty. And oh, so pretty.

Anyway, she took the measurements and got a "sizing" corset for me to try. After she puts it on me, closes the front and laced up the back, I got my first look in the mirror. Oh. My. God. I looked freaking hot. Hello, waist! Nice to meet you. Even the kid was like, "Mom, that looks so good!" I was sold. Mostly because I had been expecting not to be able to move or breathe, but I could!

So, here's what I bought:



It is complicated to put on, so Bink was brought into the dressing room to learn how to lace up her mother's corset. That's why we have kids, right?

Of course, the biggest question is when on Earth, under what circumstances would I ever wear it?! I like it, though. I even tried my shirt on over it at the shop, and it made my regular clothes look better. Nice.

Monday, January 08, 2007 

I know it's old...

But I love it, and can't stop laughing each time I watch. Enjoy!



Happy New Year, y'all.