Wednesday, October 24, 2012 


I feel sick.

"Meir" is in town. We're not friends on Facebook, but his page isn't private. He posted yesterday that he was at the airport on his way to SFO.

Now, I am fucked either way: I keep obsessively checking my email to see if he's contacted me yet, and; I'm terrified that he'll contact me and I won't say "No."

I'm afraid of seeing him, and just as afraid that he won't want to see me.

I haven't had any contact for three months, and while it was hard not to email him, it got easier. Now it's difficult. Again.

Damn it.

Friday, October 19, 2012 

Bitches Be Crazy

What the fuck is wrong with people?

I keep hearing that I should be doing informational interviews with people who work in the field I am interested in.

So far I've had significant contact with two women who are in such positions. They have the same professional background as me (though, frankly, less experience), and have since transitioned into the job I really want. Both of these people have been so fucking...I'm not sure of the word to use here...cagey isn't it, but close. So vague as to be of no help at all. Here's a reply to an email I sent:

" My leap the the other side was the product of:

- third party networking (doing informational interviews with friends or friends of mine);

- a significant amount of serendipity (meeting a friend of a friend at (Company) just at the time that (Company's) CEO decided to start a Foundation);

- and having the right work experience, skills, and qualities to fit the bill.

Good wishes to you,


Now, to me, it's a little ironic that she says she got to where she is by doing informational the one she's declining to do with me. I don't feel that anyone owes me their time. I understand it would be doing me a tremendous favor. But frankly, feels a lot like these bitches are pulling up the ladders behind themselves once they've climbed to where they want to be.